1. |
Santa Wonderland
02:04
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bada bing, are you glistening?
cold outside, snow is listening
that boy aint right
don't get in a fight
I'm gonna find the santa at the mall
I'm afraid of the new word
and my prey is the new bird
would you take me to prom
sherly crow is my mom
I'm gonna get the santa at the mall
in the alehouse we will find a dogman
and we'll have his finest christmas brew
he'll say do you carry
i'll say dogman
do the christmas job when i'm in town
In the throng I'll conspire
king icecream now for hire
the santa's afraid
that plan's that I've made
I'm gonna strike the santa at the mall
in my head-o I hear people singing
i'll pretend that they are alton brown
at the tabernacle
build a snowman
gotta free the dogman from the pound
he has drawn all my ire
in my dreams i do fire
the life that he gave
I'll send to the grave
I'm gonna blast the santa at the mall
I'm gonna harm the santa at the mall
I'm gonna end the santa at the mall
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2. |
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the season is here drinking nog out the jug
sent to the ER put my finger in the plug
sparks everywhere like for the season of lights
they childproof the plugs yeah they took away my rights
I'm sleeping in the shower cause i stink like a dog
family disowned me for greasin up like a hog
they dont know that for presents they get coal
so much coal like a superbowl of coal
christmas got me antsy case i'm scare of santa clause
sliding down his chimney yeah he has me in his jaws
why's he in the north pole doing evil all year
then we let him in our homes cause we want our kids to fear
Im always thinkin big when I go and plan my Christmas
Chillin with my besties and then makin hella Swiss Miss
I imagine on the curb while Im postin with my dudes
Totin big guns and we rate each others nudes
It's a white Christmas Eve as we standin on the block
Colored lights on the houses, mantles hangin big red socks
A "sleigh" turns the corner, and I see some "elves" I dont like
We blast em with our gats, even though we know it aint right
SLEIGH RIDE, SLEIGH RIDE, WOO IT'S CHRISTMASTIME
YOU CANT STOP IT NOW, IN MY FIST I CRUSH A LIME
I PACK MY CARRY-ON AS I SLIDE INTO MY SOCKS
ITS JUST A BIG SUITCASE THAT IVE FILLED WITH SHINY ROCKS
IN THERAPY THEY TOLD ME "WINTER BRINGS DEPRESION"
I LAUGH BECAUSE IM JOLLY AND COVER SALAD IN DRESSIN
CHRISTMAS, CHRISTMAS, SANTA SOON WILL ARRIVE
CHRISTMAS, CHRISTMAS, MY REASON TO BE ALIVE
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